Sometimes we fight & claw our way to a place where we can say "yes" to God, not because we know we should say "yes" but because our very bones desire it.

And sometimes, after a long time of "yeses", He changes the question, and we say "yes" again. 

But we don't choose "yes" because its easy, because its not, its gut wrenchingly difficult to say "yes" to God and it takes insurmountable courage to continue choosing "yes". And it takes courage because He requires every piece of our being--everything that we unknowingly hold unto.

And so, I like to say that we always have a choice. As true blood bought children of God we have two choices, choose what is "good" or choose what is "best".

So, the reason we say yes again, is because it is what is best for us. We say "yes" because we have been awakened to the beauty that we find in Jesus when we choose "yes". the faithfulness He shows, even in the messiness of it all,  is even more difficult to bypass-- once you have fully experienced it.

And we learn the Lord has used the "yeses" that our hearts have spoken and graciously He has changed the very eyes through which we see things.

And the Lord is good, that's why He changes the question, BUT our answer should never change.

Will you say "yes"? Yes, to the invitation from our Savior. Yes, to what He is requiring of you. Yes, to what He wants you to leave behind.

I love being held and hugs are my favorite-- as long as they are the tight I almost can't breathe and can't move kind.

In this season of life, I have no one to hold me. All whom I love are far away, be it physically or emotionally, so I do the next best thing... I curl up with stuff.

At night, I curl up with blankets and pillows; when I overflow in any emotion, I do the same. To me being held is being vulnerable and being vulnerable is being authentic.


Authenticity is what the LORD looks for and maybe that is why I default to it. When rainbows are shooting out of my pores because of joy, I curl up in thankfulness. When I cannot physically stand because pain is unbearable, I curl up. When I yearn for something and can feel it in my bones, I curl up.

There have been times when I am curled up, and the LORD oh so sweetly comes down and envelops me with His arms. The hold so strong and yet so delicate crumbles any sort of composure I had mustered up to that point. So, I lay there undone in the arms of the Father caught up in all things Holy.

As, I look back on those times, I cannot fathom a better place to be, and I even find myself waiting for the next embrace. What is beautiful is that the Father feels the same way.

The Gospel, all of Redemptive History, His first coming and His second coming all say so.
(Im going to focus on His first and second comings in this post)

He came the first time not only to die for my sins and reconcile me to God, He came to woo me. He came to show me who He is. When He came 2,000 years ago He did not withhold any love or information from me. He came to court me, and He is coming back to marry me.

He is coming back. That is a fact, and when He does, He is coming to make all things new. He will do away with the flesh and fully glorify His children. BUT, He also is coming back to embrace me, to hold me, to do away with the waiting and the suffering without Him.

So, I sit here now in 2012 in-between His two comings. He is not here, but its not like He is far away from me. He gave us a counselor, the Holy Spirit. He is present in this life, make no mistake, but there is a difference between now and when He comes back.

Now, He sits at the right hand of God pleading a case for us, interceding for us, longing to come back to us; because He is patient He does not.

When He returns, there will be no need to intercede for us, all things will be made restored. He will be here in person (person is a terrible word to describe this awesome promise; our human vocabulary is limited in the area of Holy). I will be able to touch Him. His embrace will be all the more marvelous, and all the more enthralling. I will be more undone.

My hope is to be embraced by Jesus Christ, to fully behold Him. I cannot escape this promise nor do I want to.

That Day I will be able to gaze upon His unveiled face, His arms will encompass all that I am, and I will be home.

*Do not claim any rights for the picture.